Top 10 things you needed to know about me.

1) In Eastern Africa you can buy beer brewed from Ashley.
[it's some sweet stuff I dare say I taste pretty damn good, I highly recommend it]

2) Banging your head against Ashley uses 150 calories an hour!
[good thing I don't bruse easily]

3) Ashley cannot jump.
[no, but I do bound and leap quite effectively]

4) If you drop Ashley from more than three metres above ground level, she will always land feet-first.
[arial acrobatics - it's the only way to go]

5) Ashley can jump up to sixteen times her own height.
[Wait, I thought I couldn't jump?]

6) Ashley is the traditional gift for a couple on their third wedding anniversary.
[Hello menage a tois!]

7) Bees visit over three million flowers to make a single kilogram of Ashley!
[I'm sweeter than honey, probubly the reason I provode prime tastiness when fermented]

8) Humans share about fifty percent of their DNA with Ashley!
[Damn, is this the worlds way of saying I've been around the block a bit? .... I think I'll plead the fith on this one]

9) Ashley will give a higher yield if milked when listening to music.
[Hey, with the right goovy tunes it's amaizing what one might accomplish]

10) If you chew gum while peeling Ashley then it will stop you from crying.
[damn sunburns ... Well, if you're going to cry about it, I'll just peel myself!]