The Sheath Was Empty!

I come into work today and start running my controls when, behold! the sheath is empty. This is cause for concern when the sheath is empty. My first thoughts were, "What is the sheath". And then I realized, and when I checked it out, sure enough it was empty. Well, there was a tiny tiny bit in there, but obviously nothing I could use. I had to find new sheath. I searched all along the cabinets, the floorboards and the shelves to find a new sheath. Finally I found not one, but two under the sink. Thank goodness, I didn't know what I was going to do without any sheath, certainly not my job. So I switched out the sheaths, the empty for the full and started over. This is when I realized there was a new fault. It still thought the sheath was empty!!! NO! I say, "I have a nice full sheath here! Work damn you. What's wrong with you, why won't you get the job done?" It took a bit of fiddling around, but it finally realized I had a full sheath now and it ran through it's processes like butter.

Not my cell-dyn, but it's twin .... I bet it has a full sheath.

This is a Streck brand Sheath, we use Abbott Sheath but I couldn't find a picture

of that so I figured this was the best way for you to at least see the sheath.

Just imagine it in a brown box with a purple label instead.

The Towelphant Strikes Again!!!

Poor Costello has fallen victim to the evil Towelphant!

You can see the evil taking over ... clouding his poor doggie mind. He is helpless to fight it ...

Allas, there was nothing I could do. The power of the Towelephant is too great. Evil is all the remains now in my poor pu. So stern, so cold is the gaze of my Rind-Hund. I dare say I'll miss all his snuggle wiggles.

My friends call me Welch but you can call me Welbeecos ... aka ... More procrastinatoin

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME:
(favorite fruit and current street name)

--Pomegranate Hollow Ridge --

~I sound like some hippie poet. I'm definately going indi-rock on this one.


2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME:
(grandfather/grandmother on mother's side first name, favorite candy)

--Nancy 60% Cocoa Ghirardelli Chocolate--

~that’s a mouthfull


3. YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME:
(first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)

--A Wel--

~ A Wel and da C dawg are gonna be hittin the park, biatches!


4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME:
(favorite animal, name of high school)

--Elephant Blue Springs--

~umm, how now brown cow? this doesn't make any sense at all.


5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME:
(middle name, city where you were born)

--Ann Independence--

~now does that sound like the name of the show's bitch or naive pushover?


6. YOUR OPPOSITE SEX NAME:
(name of dad/mom, cell phone company you use)

--Larry Verizon--

~ I sound like I have a lot of money ... I wonder if I'm single ...


7. YOUR STAR WARS NAME:
(first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name)

--Welbeecos--

~ok, not into the whole star wars thing, but I'm digging this, I'm going to use this.


8. PORN STAR NAME:
(first pet's name, street you grew up on)

--Sara Tahoe--

~and a whoe of ta I surely must be ... bow chick a bow wow.

I"m procrastinating, I couldn't help myself.

Your results:
You are Supergirl

Supergirl 78% Spider-Man 75% Catwoman 75% Hulk 70% Iron Man 70% Wonder Woman 68% Green Lantern 60% Superman 55% The Flash 45% Batman 25% Robin 25%

Lean, muscular and feminine. Honest and a defender of the innocent.

da link, if you're interested

Hyper-flavor Icecream

Ok, all of us who grew up in a certain age called the 80's/90's know of the most wonderful clothing invention of all time --- hyper-color. For those who aren't familiar, hyper-color was a fascinating brand of clothing that was one color and depending on how much you breathed on it, it would change color. The concept was to be a mood ring but as a t-shirt and shorts. Yes, yes, this is right up there with paddleball and wacky wall walkers.

Anyway, I've discovered hyper-color's new, and sure to be underappreciated, cousin. Ladies and Gentlemen I give you HYPERFLAVOR ICECREAM! This crazy new product can be found just down the street (if you live in CoMo) and you never knew. Heck, I didn't even know it till I ordered it by accident and tried it for myself.

Like the purple turns to pink before it I ordered a rocky-road concrete (substitute almonds for peanuts) and lo-and-behold I get CANDY CORN! Yes, this is as disturbing and discusting as it sounds. Little did I know when taking a bite of my creamy brown nutty goodness that I would come face to mouth with the ever way to sweet taste of candy corn. To me this was a crowning disappointment, for those of you out there that actually like the most wretched of orange candy Halloween treats then hey, I send my recommendations. For those of you with me, beware. I wonder what other flavors lurk to upset your stomach. Perhaps a Mint Chocolate Chip that tastes like banana laughy taffy? Or a Butter Pecan that becomes good and plenty? What ever it may be I do have to say I deeply miss my Emack and Bolios; where are you my ice cream that tastes as it should? Surely not at this cracked out custard stand.

The reality is just sickening isn't it?

Oh God, please make it stop ...

Ok, I think I just threw up in my mouth a bit.

Crowning Achievement!

Congratulations to me! Through all of my fun medicated times I have now officially managed to take every NSAID on the market, (and even a few that have been taken off due to fatal side effects). So congrats to me for beating the Rx system. All you pharm companies out there can take that hit to the bank and come back to me once you've made something that actually works! Assholes.

mmmm ... this is candy, we're having fun!

Evil Queen of the Towel Heads

Ok, I found this at the Wall of Mart and people who know me know I can't pass up a cheap elephant deal, or the opportunity to be embarrasing. So, enjoy-->

First I'd just like to present the towel and make you jealous; come on you know you are.

You want to rush out and be a towel head now.

I mean ... look how much fun I"m having!!!

I'm so cool.

Oh what is this strange sensation coming over me?

I can feel the power of the towel surging through me.

I know what it is that I must do!

I wonder if anyone can sense my evil plans.

Look into the eyes of my towel.

You will obey the towel.

Worship the towel.

HA HA! THE WORLD IS MINE!

I rock.

Beware the Full Metal Jacket!

So the time has come for many of us to go to town on our mouths. M's got her fun surgeries and I due to the loss of a bet, (no not the Superbowl though I am very sad for my Seahawks), I'm in the market for metallic oral enhancements.

So far all the DDS's that I've come across want to do horrific things to me.

#1) One's out for blood (literally and figuratively). $5000 smackers (the figurative blood, ouch, I'm a med student you think I have that kind of money? yeah right, I can't even buy food this month, though I guess that would be good for the braces and possibly my thighs; but I digress.), 18 months and let's remove 4 of my teeth just for giggles (the literal blood, as if you couldn't figure that out for yourself, ouch again). Oh wait I’m sorry, there is a reason for that not just to pump up our oral surgeon buddy and get a kick back; "I would have a more pleasing profile". So not an oral hygiene reason but hey, i guess it's a reason.

#2) we're better here on the greenbacks, cut it back by $1,100; better but still not good, we're now up to a two year sentence in mouth prison but then we don't want to remove my teeth, oh wait, even better we're going to file down all the nice healthy enamel off them, right in between my teeth so that when I'm trying to do Chinese acrobats with floss just so that I don't immediately get the cavities that would be inevitable with this procedure. Though this would make some dentist really happy, I vote no.

So here I am, continuing to shop around till I at least find someone who would like to leave all of my teeth intact, in my mouth. Some how I don’t' think that's too much to ask. I mean, they all fit in there before all pretty and perfect, surely they still will. So I've decided to take my journey back to KC and see if I can find anything more promising there.

There was a kind man there once that told me 6mo, $1250, and said nothing about removing any teeth or parts there of. I just hope he has similar music for my ears on Friday. Sure, he wanted to put metal spikes in my mouth but hey they served an actually practical orthodontic purpose and I'd take the spikes any day over random teeth extractions. My tongue would hate me but the teeth thank me. It's ok my pearls of white, you're safe with me I'll never let those mean men take you away from your loving gums.

interesting theory ... more like ....

Crazy metal brackets of doom! Adults beware, public humiliation is imminent!
(I knew I wanted to look 13 again, pedophiles are great lovers, so tender and attentive. *shutter*)